Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Grad School: The Worst Idea of All Time?

Today I find myself with one hobby: school. Before it was school, friends, b/fs, drinking, shopping, blah, blah, blah. Now all I have to do is read and study for school and for some "mysterious reason(s)" I cannot bring myself to do it. Partially to blame is Cody Posey, the 16-year-old accused (and admitted) murderer of his family a year and a half ago in Hondo, NM, at Sam Donaldson's ranch near Ruidoso/Capitan/Lincoln. The trial is on TV ALL DAY on CourtTV and I can't look away. Not to mention the dominatrix murder case and that English dude who probably killed his wife and baby like Scott Peterson. Cody, seriously, why does your case have to be so intruiging? Add onto that ties to his defense lawyer, Gary Mitchell (whose office is in the Dizzle), who looks like the big, crazy boss-guy in Happy Gilmore (Richard Kiel), and you have daytime entertainment to rival the likes of Passions...

Here are other reasons why I can't bring myself to study:

1. The Structure of Scientific Revolutions by Kuhn (a book I feel is geared toward one person: Steven Hawking)
2. The Iowa Study of Hybrid Seed Corn: The Adoption of Innovation (yeaahhhh... a book chapter about corn. I feel dumber already.)
3. Magic Bullet Theory (Maud and Sack, if you don't know what this is, you should have taken more classes from McCleneghan)
4. Independent and Dependent Variables (I still can't figure out which is which)
5. Law & Orders: CI and SVU
6. Public Relations Theories
7. Statistics
8. Eighty-seven percent of grad students are total weirdos, foreign, pompous Star Wars freaks with mullets, or total idiots who cannot put together a sentence (most MCOM TAs know who I'm talking about), but somehow managed to get past graduate school admissions... therefore I do not want to go back to class

There are many other reasons, of course; distracting life circumstances... But here's what may be the beginning of the end: I have to BLOG for this class I'm taking. This may be the first sign of the apocalypse. So if you want to read about Contemporary Issues in Mass Communications Technology before a tear occurs in the universe and we can no longer read about seed corn innovation, click here. I tried to keep my one entry to date true to myself... it has a picture and everything! All other content I cannot be held accountable for.

Monday, January 30, 2006

The World According to Sack.

So everyone, it has come to my attention that our very own #1 Aggie fan, Sack, has started a blog of his very own! And since he comes from the likes of the Journalism and Mass Communication realm of New Mexico State University (just as Maud and I did), you can probably rest assured that the content will be of the greatest, albeit raunchy at times, quality.

Click here to enter Sack's World...

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Giant Pink Elephant

So I need to discuss what has just happened to me and my family to make sure there are no giant pink elephants in the room that people ignore when I’m around (even though I bet Eve would greatly enjoy a giant pink elephant as a pet or something, as long as it never pooped), or that I become the weird kid that people talk about and wonder how she’s doing, but never say anything to her…

Most everybody who reads this blog knows that my brother Matt passed away on January 6, sometime in the late morning/afternoon. We still don’t know why (he passed away in his sleep), but hopefully in the next two or three months we will.

I also know that most everybody who reads this blog, the Wheeler blog, or has just hung out with me has probably met one or both of my brothers. We are and have been very close since we quit fighting with each other sometime when I was in high school. We are just all best friends, basically. The older we all got, the more my two younger brothers started acting like they were the older ones, taking care of me and my mom. Matt and I had become especially close since Josh has been preoccupied with a person I like to refer to as the Psycho Hose Beast… we’ll save that one for another blog (or see my rant starting with something about the movie Fatal Attraction on the Wheeler Blog). Anyways, we talked pretty much every week, hung out when I went to Ruidoso or he came to Lubbock, and even though he made fun of my costochondritis, he drove me back to Lubbock so I could go back to school. You could not ask for a better brother.

So pretty much this loss has been devastating to me and my whole family. If you’ve lost someone you were terribly close to, maybe you understand what it feels like. Most of the time I feel like my heart is broken, I’m on the verge of tears, and someone who weighs about 200 pounds is standing on my chest. It’s an excruciating, empty, but heavy feeling that makes you want to just lay in bed all day, thinking about the what if’s, the if only’s, and replaying all the painful events in your mind.

I just wanted to let everyone know that I appreciate the calls and everything. I have ignored a lot of calls just because I wasn’t really able to talk at the time, or didn’t feel like explaining what happened. Plus, there just isn’t a lot to say. I haven't even checked my voicemail since it happened because I know the messages will probably make me cry. Right now we’re all trying to move along, trying to get through a day without crying, and just taking it minute by minute if I need to. What does help is thinking about my brother being in a place so awesome that he would not want to come back here if he could. It’s the only thing that is even mildly comforting right now.

So it’s back to school for me tomorrow. I’m going to be between Borger and Ruidoso for the semester. I have a grant that gives me in state tuition that I can’t pass up, plus we think that if it had been someone other than Matt that was gone, he would go on doing what he needed and wanted to, so that’s what we’re going to try to do. I wish I could write something more profound, but my mind is still on the mend. I learned a lot from my brother in the 21 years he was with us, including how to snowboard and a life lesson that doing something you hate for a living is not an option. We were lucky to have had him in our lives for as long as we did, and God willing we’ll be with him again someday.

Josh and I wrote a piece to celebrate Matt's life. If you'd like to read it, click here and please comment with memories of Matt, or whatever you'd like to say.